Here there be dragons...

"I'm telling you stories. Trust me." - Winterson

When product reviews take a life of their own...

I laughed and laughed and laughed... (but then I'm a geek :) When product reviews take a life of their own: "Very good if you need to write on paper". hahaha somebody felt the need to post a fairly in-depth review a BIC pen on Amazon. The resulting comments and other reviews are somewhat amusing. If only to note how much free time people have!

Some things I'll be sure to consider when making my next important writing utensil purchase:

"Worked fine with my right hand, but when I came to use my left hand my writing came out looking like the work of a complete imbecile. I can only assume Bic have created a right-handed only pen, and would caution left-handers to "try before you buy"."

I recently watched a film called the bourne identity, he killed a man with this very model of pen.

An important consideration: I often use pencils to write notes on paper, but have been thinking about changing to a pen. Is this pen a good starting point for a novice?

It is worth remembering that your pen will last longer if you don't bother to dot your I's and J's!

I purchased this biro to test out the old adage that the pen is mightier than the sword. Having challenged a black belt Kendo champion to a fight I am now down to one arm and I think the bic got stepped on - so the old saying is a load of rubbish.
---

And just cause it fell under the realm of flash fiction (I hope!) and it's almost Friday I share this post in its entirety:

I bought this item 2 years ago now and i have to say, it was the best decision i ever made; not only is it a unfaultable writing tool but it has saved my life on numerous occasions. The first time it proved a lifesaver was in my local convenience store; i had merely entered with the intention to buy a bar of chocolate when a masked man came in behind me with a gun. He shouted at everyone to get on the floor which we did. He then demanded all the money out of the till,however the cashier refused to comply and i am sure that if i had not intervened, he would not be alive today. Grabbing the nearest item i could find (which turned out to be a terry's chocolate orange), i threw it at the man to draw his attention. In reflex, the man shot at my chest, but luckily i had my pen in my chest pocket so the bullet merely rebounded off the pen and struck the man in his hand, causing him to drop the gun. He then fled the premises, so thanks to this pen, both the cashiers and my lives were saved.

The second time it proved to be of assistance was when i was on holiday in a remote part of Wales, i chanced upon a hidden cave in a cliff. As a generally inquisitive person, i could not resist to explore, however, on entering the cave there was a loud rumbling and the entrance colapsed, leaving no way out. To my furthur dismay, i discovered that i was not the only being present; a large bear was also present which luckily had not noticed me. Using the only tools available to me, i fashioned a crude bow which i used to fire the pen as a missile at the bear. As always, the pen proved a reliable resource and struck it in the eye, rendering it unconcious. I then used the pen as a means of removing the rubble to allow me to reach freedom.

The last time it saved my life, i was in my basement when i had a leak. As i have no drains, a leak could prove extremely serious so i was urgently trying to fix it when my hand got caught between two pipes and i could not remove it. The basement continued to fill with water and when i was almost out of my depth, i decided i had to do something drastic, so i used the pen as a saw to cut through my wrist. I was then able to phone an ambulance and a plumber, however they were not able to save my hand. Ironically it was my right hand, so my pen was the item which rendered me unable to use a pen, so regretfully, i have stopped carrying it around with me.

I would greatly reccomend this pen as it serves very well at a wide range of applications, for example, a bullet shield, an arrow/missile, a pickaxe, a saw and even... a pen!

0 comments:

Post a Comment