Here there be dragons...

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Highs and Lows

Ok so I should be asleep right now, cause really I'm exhausted. But I'm too keyed up so I figured I'd write and then sleep. I usually don't do personal in this blog, but today really got to me so here goes. Consider yourself forewarned.

*edited to add* - post has been significantly edited from the original due to not passing the 24 h rule. hahaha did you get to read the fun version?

So today was a highs and lows kinda day.

Work was interesting and very busy, which I prefer. So that's a high.

Then I get home and find out Sherlock (my cat) is missing. That's a serious low. Look all over for him inside and out. No sign.

But I had to go teach. Perhaps a good thing, as it got me out of there. But totally not appropriate to go try and teach in that mindset (ummm deleted p explained why I was LIVID beyond rational thought). I've had a couple coaches who take their personal frustrations out on their students, and that's really not right. N then I've had two in particular who are absolutely phenomenal about putting whatever is going on in their world away when they deal with clients. As in they've been ranting to me about X, totally over the top upset, and a client walks in and they just switch it off. You'd never know. Client leaves and rant resumes :) And having observed this a few times, I know this is how I intend to deal with my clients. I also know I'm not quite *that* good at it yet. So I detoured on my way to teach and went to see my pony. Made up her dinner, cleaned out her water buckets, and then just went to hang out with her in the field for a bit. And when her ears went forward and she left her hay and her friends to come see me, it helped stabilize the emotions a little. "The outside of the horse is good for the inside of the man." Or something like that :) - Winston Churchill. So that's a high.

So went to teach. Lessons were going really well. Had an extra in one class who was a real pleasure to teach. High. One of my students was having her last lesson before leaving for uni. Went well, but I'm going to miss having her in the class. High and low.

In my last lesson I was teaching and somebody was waiting for the ring. As we were working on a reasonably simple exercise I invited her in to ride around, which she did. But when she was done riding and I offered to let her out, she said she'd really rather stay and listen because she was really interested in what I was saying. And I shortly thereafter had a similar comment from her mother on the sidelines. That is about as HIGH as it gets :) When people are interested and ask intelligent questions and think about what I'm saying, it really validates all the work and effort I put into coaching. It's such a little thing, from a random stranger I could barely see in the dark (there were some lightbulb issues :), but it totally made my night.

So drive home. N of course as soon as I leave the barn the reality of what I left behind returns. But I know cats are nocturnal. And I know where Sherlock was found the last time he disappeared (a couple years ago. An accident, with an apology and a search. He was gone for TEN days and returned @ half his body weight. So you can see why I'd be concerned). So I went out to that area with a mini-flashlight and I called and I called and then...

I FOUND HIM!!! Woohoo HUGE HUGE HUGE HIGH!!!! And he came right to me, meowing his really scared meow. So I picked him up and brought him back.

Problem, the porch light is on, which makes Sherlock panic (and yes he still has his claws). AND the door is locked. Keys are in my jean pockets. Ever try to hold a cat who's panicking and doesn't want to be held? One who still has his claws? Ever try to do it with ONE hand??? So I rang the bell. With two hands I could hold the cat and keep him from scratching me. By this point he was hissing. I've never (10 years remember?) heard him hiss like that before. No answer. Rang the bell again and again andagainandagainandagain in rapid fire succession. Did this for about 3 minutes (although it felt like *forever*) -- just continually ringing it. I know there are people home. I also know they're known for ignoring the door. But I would've thought the excessiveness of it would've convinced somebody to come see. But no. Low.

So I pin cat to the ground and feel absolutely horrible for doing so. Serious Low. He came to me so bravely when I called him and let me pick him up (which we all know is a huge sign of trust. And he doesn't let anybody else hold him for more than about a second and a half.) and carry him all the way back. And then I force him down in a scary place and hold him there. While with my other hand I fiddle with the keys and try to get the door open. When I did manage to get it open he ran right in. High.

*Deleted mini-novel that was a significant Low.*

So now the cat is home, and I'm sooooo incredibly relieved. High. But I don't particularly want to be here any more. Low.

*edited to add* -- after I posted this I went in the office of the third member of our little party (who had thus far stayed out of everything) and found a stack of "Missing Sherlock" posters. That effort is hugely appreciated. Esp as with my schedule I'm not likely to be home to search much till Thurs... Another High.

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